This is going to stay exactly the way I have written it until Linda gives me something more interesting.

A long time ago in a hillbilly town far far away Linda was a slave to the retail world when one day the shine off a gentlemans head caught her attention. As she looked up she was blinded by the heavenly glow of Gil and was transfixed!

blah blah blah, she cooks real good and lets me hang out so she's aces with me.